Comfort and joy
Christmas lists and thoughts of presents. There is such magic in the air for children at this time of year. I looked down at my son this morning as we were talking about going to see Santa Claus. This year there is a really cool thing going on at the zoo with lights and hot cocoa and cider, and all the animals, and other special things for the kids to do. It made me remember going to the festival of lights in City Park in New Orleans every year when the kids were little. We’d visit Santa in Story Land right behind all the teenie kid rides, ride some of the rides, walk through the botanical gardens and drive through the park. It seems now like such a wonderful time. And somehow it was. We would sometimes go with Lee and Fred, and Katie and Aaron loved having mama and papa there with all of us.
I was looking through the photo albums today and reminiscing about those holidays. I’ve always dreaded the holidays a bit. I tried to find the joy by looking at it through my children’s eyes. The wonder is something that goes away just all too quickly.
And that is where I started this p0st. Talking about the wonder and awe on my little one’s face. Yule is a magical time for kids where wonders are supposed to take place. Mark doesn’t want to go to see Santa this year. I don’t know why. It may be something that is left over with sadness/anger/pain about the divorce. We talked about Santa and he only stops coming once you stop believing in him. But as we talked about what he wants, they are such simple things. And truth be told this year I am grateful for the people in my life and the fact that we have a roof over our heads, our utilities are all on (well I lost my cell phone but I can live without it for a while) and that we have food to eat. It’s hard to imagine where I will find money to pay for any gifts this year. But I know things will work out. Though we seem to walk the fine edge of a knife we have done ok so far. I think we will continue to do so.
But this year I’m concentrating on the simple things. Making cookies with the boys (if Spence wants to). Decorating the house. Putting up the tree. Listening to music. Watching all the old shows. And just soaking up being together. I guess those are my Christmas wishes. Along with having Katie and Aaron want to spend some time with me.
